"So what?!" Let me explain.
Crash Worship is a band who rely heavily on their drummers. In fact, they have four of them. None of them have regular sit-down kits; They build their own drums. If you buy one of their albums, you probably won't be impressed. Their music is very tribal, with some sound effects and crazy bass guitar and industrial vox thrown in. Mostly tribal-sounding stuff, like real thick compound rhythms and booming drum sounds and wood blocks. Tribal tribal Tribal.
"So what?!?!" I'm getting there.
Their recordings suck. Compared to what they do live, that is! The reason I went to see these guys play is because they have a reputation of giving incredible concerts. It's not the music- It's the spirit that makes the show. It's the stuff they throw into the audience, like water, wine, fire-crackers, ice cubes, people running around squirting whipped cream and strawberry syrup everywhere. People rubbing Vapo-Rub on each other. Mostly-naked women are passed around, floating over the audience. Paint, dirt, fake blood everywhere. And tribal, primal music.
It was, without exaggeration, the most incredible mental blitz I've ever been on. For one thing, I was completely surrounded by people. Most of them are dancing or bopping around in some way, and plenty of people had no shirts on (including me). Most of the women were fully dressed, eh, most... So, while I was enjoying the hip music, I was getting completely messy. Commodities were being thrown everywhere. Crash Worship workers were running around the crowd, pouring water and wine on everyone. Lots of people brought their own stuff and didn't hesitate to smear me with Listerine, sour cream, and plenty of other nasty stuff that I wasn't able to recognize.
And yes, we were packed in like sardines. So, there was a lot
of touching going on. Not erotic touching, exactly. Everyone was
being buffeted by the wild crowd, and everyone was rubbing up
against everyone else. This included rubbing people's backs, stroking
people in odd places, and lots of fancy footwork as the floor
got slippery. At first, being tossed around by the crowd was
very annoying. But I moved over to one side of the room and things
got much better from there.
In fact, I reverted to a PRIMAL state. I couldn't stop dancing and touching everyone (purposefully and otherwise). It was really incredible, I became a genuine BEAST. The high point of the evening was when I let out a big scream, and a gorgeous girl standing next to me did the same. I screamed again and so did she, and we turned to each other and stared. I wanted to say something to her, but get this-I COULDN'T. I could not form words. I completely forgot how to use the English language. Apparently she was in this midset too, because we grabbed each other and tried to kiss. It didn't exactly work, because everyone around us was bumping into us so I ended up raking my teeth on her jaw. So, she moved in front of me and we did a pretty nasty, intimate dance, the details of which I am not going to relate. It was really dark, so I can't remember what she looked like, but I'm positive she was totally beautiful.
And things got even crazier! People paraded through the crowd with lit torches, and dumped artificial creamer everywhere, so there was lots of pyrotechnic fun to be had. Another high point of the evening was when a rope was being passed around the crowd, a big thick one. Someone had lit a fire inside of a barrel, and was trying to retrieve the nasty, constricting thing and burn it. The music became very quiet as I helped yank the rope out of people's hands, and in fact, I ended up throwing the last bit of rope into the blaze.
And just as I did that, the band kicked back in with full force, and in my primal daze, I suddenly felt REALLY SPECIAL. Everyone ran over to me and served me grapes and lots of wine, and everything.
What a great show! I can't describe the SHEER JOY that came with being totally uninhibited and smashing into people while chaos broke loose around me. A lot of people got pretty turned on by the whole event (I did get rather excited at points, I confess) but the feeling that dominated my brain through the whole thing was "UNITY". Strenghth in numbers. We will persist. It was actually fun to be part of the herd. There was no pretention between people, and everyone on the main floor was clearly having a great time. Some people couldn't take it and cowered in corners, or passed out on the pool tables. (This was at Berkeley Square, by the way. Ever been? It usually sucks.)
I really, really, REALLY encourage people to see these guys play. Bring ear plugs, of course, and wear clothes you don't care about. You will sweat a LOT. I was steaming when I stepped outside after the show, and I had to go back in and drink an entire pitcher of water so that I wouldn't dehydrate and pass out. Prepare to see naked people on stage, there will be plenty of them. And bring whistles, or something to rub on people, and definetely wear boots! I hear some of their other shows have been even crazier than the mayhem that ensued tonight, but I won't relate the details. Go see them and surprise yourself. You probably don't think it's as good as I'm making it out to be, which is good, because then it will REALLY blow you away. Go see them. Did I mention you should go see them?!!! The next time they come around, I am forcing all of you to attend. MARK MY FUCKING WORDS!!!
I really wish shows like this one happened more often. I'm looking forward to another fully sensory concert, where I can forget how to talk!!! I'll keep you all posted.
I'm giving two-weeks notice at my job tomorrow (today). Fuck Kinko's, they suck.
BOOM chuka chuka BOOM chuka chuka BOOM chuka chuka BOOM bambam
BOOM chuka chuka BOOM chuka chuka BOOM chuka chuka BOOM bambam
BOOM chuka chuka BOOM chuka BOOM BOOM bambam BOOM
-- Zoggie
-- Extremely happy, worn-out boy